Be Still and Know

By Sarah Levesque Losardo (Photo provided by the author)

Since my husband Jacob came into my life, I have learned more about love then I dreamed of. As St. John tells us, God IS love, and it has been interesting to see how my relationship with Jacob has made me understand more about God.

“Pray unceasingly”

Since the day God put us into each other’s lives, not a day has gone by without Jacob and I talking to each other, originally over text, then adding phone calls, then adding video calls. I want to hear every detail of his day, and I want to share every single little joy and hardship of my day with him, and he wants to hear it. So does God. Yes, He is there in the moment, but if Jacob was, I would be communicating with him, so why not the Lord? Jacob and I talk over situations that we were in together as well as those we experienced separately; why not do that with God? That is what prayer is – merely talking with God. Not just TO God, though that is part of it, but WITH God – letting Him answer you. This is something I need to work on. And another part of prayer is praise. How often do I remind Jacob just what he means to me? But I spend much less time reminding God (and myself) how much He means to me. Before Jacob, I thought it was odd to tell God over and over that He is good and powerful and merciful, etc. Surely He already knew that, and I knew I hate being told things I already know. But with Jacob, that reminder, that reassurance, is a delight to both of us. So it ought to be with God.

“God with us”

As I began to realize that Jacob was the man God was calling me to spend the rest of my life with, I began to miss him dreadfully when he wasn’t around. I yearned for his presence. This led me to realize better the extent God yearns for us. He corrects us and forgives us over and over again. He died a most gruesome death so that we might have borrowed merit on which to enter Heaven. He comes to us in the humble and vulnerable guise of bread and wine that we may consume him and truly be, as He said, “…one with me as I am one with the Father.” He truly is “God with us,” yet so often we are not one with Him. So often we take these things for granted, we fail to appreciate and be grateful, we focus not on Him, but on our to-do lists or difficulties or failures or other things going on in our lives. All these things are normal, but instead of letting them distract you from God, bring them TO God and let Him share them with you. Easier said than done, I know! But let us strive to be present with Him.

“Be still and know”

There have been many times throughout our engagement that Jacob and I decided to take a nap on the couch. He falls asleep comically quickly, whereas I tend to take much longer, if I fall asleep at all in the small space. But I am safe and secure and at peace in his arms, and it has led me to the Scripture verse, “Be still and know that I am God.” I can be still and know that Jacob loves me, even when he is sleeping. His presence, his touch, his smell, even his snoring helps me to feel at peace, and I feel no need to fidget and I am not bored, because I am surrounded by his love. How much more, then, should I “be still and know” God when I am in prayer or in Adoration? For He loves me unimaginably more than Jacob does – again, He IS love itself. With this realization, with this practice with Jacob, I am better able to sit with the Lord peacefully, particularly in front of Him in the Blessed Sacrament (Eucharistic Adoration). I still have a long way to go, but I’m moving in the right direction.

“Little things with great love”

Jacob has shown me that the little details can show love. He “proves” his love by cooking for me, by helping me in my work, by clearing the dinner dishes before it occurs to me, by listening to me ramble on, and in so many other little ways. I try to do likewise, and it helps that I know what Jacob likes and how he prefers to be shown love. We all want to be heard; we all want to be shown love in specific ways, even God. In fact, He told us how He wants to be shown love – with our whole hearts, minds, souls, and strength, and by loving our neighbor as ourselves. St. Therese of Lisieux wrote of how every tiny annoyance sacrificed can bring us closer to God. Mother Teresa of Calcutta quipped about serving God by scrubbing toilets. When we do little things for others, particularly things we are not fond of, and we do them cheerfully with love, we are building our relationship with God as well as those around us. I still struggle with this, but making these connections has helped me to reset.

Each of these realizations, these connections, has helped me see my relationship with the Lord in a new light, one that shows me the problems that I need to work on to have a better relationship with Him. If I can work on my relationship with Jacob with intention and joy, surely I can work on my relationship with the Lord of Love in a similar way. He, like Jacob, will meet me where I’m at and help me on this road to eternity. I have no need to remind myself that I want to spend the rest of my life with Jacob, so we need to always be growing in our relationship. Yet I sometimes need to remind myself that I want to spend not just the rest of my life but ALL ETERNITY with God, so how much more should I be working on my relationship with Him? I try, certainly, but so much of it has become automatic and in need of renewal. So I will strive to do better, to focus better, to allow God into my heart and mind better, and to show Him my love better.